You are so right about the way the National Milk Bank and Prolacta milk collectors in general treat their breastmilk donors. It’s very condescending and dishonest. The “‘cutesy-pootsey” description is very apt. *Barf*

You are very welcome, btw, and I am just glad you know now and can tell other people who may consider donating their milk about all their options (and all the consequences associated with each option). If I were able to donate milk, I would totally go with MilkShare. It’s just about the most pure way to donate breastmilk there is — no middleman, no lying. Just honest, DIRECT donations made in good faith. The MilkShare system honors the intelligence of both the donors and the recipients. It doesn’t assume either one of them are idiots (like Prolacta seems to). It allows people to sort out the arrangements for themselves, and that’s really cool. I’m really glad the MilkShare alternative exists, ’cause if it didn’t, I’d have my work cut out for me in trying to create it from scratch.

It gets so bad sometimes that I want to redecorate my “milk bank pump”. I almost want to puke sometimes when I use it. But what else can I do? I’m committed to pumping for my baby, and extras continue to go to MilkShare or whomever could use it.

Thanks for your encouragement and your help! I’ll never be able to express how much you did help. I am serious in that I was getting physically ILL about the whole situation until you stepped in. Thanks!

Oh, and regarding this post….to me, there is no philosophical debate. Right is right, wrong is wrong. You lie to me, (as did NMB) I get very upset. I’m a very generous person by nature and probably would have helped anyhow, so they just didn’t have to screw me by lying. I hate that!

(((HUG)))

When I think of that, of the NICU time your baby spent, of the pumping and the stress of all of that, and of your sacrifice, it just breaks my heart. Especially when I think of all the other women out there that are going through (or have gone through) similar situations as yours, given so much of themselves, only to be taken advantage of… It is really, really upsetting to me, and it’s one of my biggest motivators in continuing to write.

I really hope you are able to get resolution for this. I am amazed by your bravery in sharing your story here, for all the world to see.

I don’t know if it’d be worth the time or trouble if I was doing this on my own. If I started a class-action or joined one, maybe I could hack it.

And yes, I was told they were not for profit and then they change their story that they have to have some sort of benefit from it. Tried to make me feel that I was being irrational. I’m sorry, but the milk I obtained and sent could have helped FOR FREE 1 baby for at least a couple of months through MilkShare. And this milk was from blood sweat and tears, especially during my daughter’s NICU stay. I’m still hacked, but I’m more hacked at the betrayal.

Here in the USA, the best place to report fraud like this is the Federal Trade Commission, or FTC: http://www.ftc.gov/. They have an online form you can fill out: https://rn.ftc.gov/pls/dod/wsolcq$.startup?Z_ORG_CODE=PU01. The complaint form is general, so there are some things on it that wouldn’t apply to milk donation situations, but it’s still worth reporting if you feel you have been wronged.

Thanks for bringing this up, Lauredhel, and for seeing through the facade.

I BLINDLY donated over FOUR coolers (that’s OVER 1000 ounces, folks) to NMB and I was TOLD that this milk would be processed by Prolacta and then distributed DIRECTLY to NICUs for preemies at NO COST to the Mamas.

Just another example of how Prolacta lie to people while their PR people pretend that they don’t. All the above statements are technically correct, or almost so, but strung together in a story they leave out the MOST important fact, the fact that hospitals or insurance companies are paying a fortune for the milk. These costs are, obviously, then passed on to patients, but because the mother doesn’t see a direct bill from Prolacta, they pretend that there was “no cost”.

This combined with their “.org” website names and the fact that at least one of their websites (NMB) openly lied saying it was “non-profit” at one stage, and it all adds up to you having experienced deceptive and misleading conduct.

Betty have you talked to any authorities in your area? Business or charity watchdogs? Law enforcement? (Sorry, I’m not in the USA and so not clear on exactly who handles complaints about businesses lying and pretending to be charities in order to solicit donations).

Your account of your experience warms my heart. Thank you so much for taking the time out of your day to share it with everyone who may read it. Thank you so much.

I’m really, really glad you were able to continue donating and that you now know at least one family who has benefited greatly from your generosity and love. Thank goodness for MilkShare… It cuts through all the B.S. and allows kind donor moms to get in touch with real families.

If anyone is interested in reading more about “Betty’s” experience, here’s the post she referred to: http://www.breastfeedingsymbol.org/2007/07/29/reader-mail/

Because IBMP is associated with Prolacta, I STRONGLY caution ANYONE to make sure that you are INFORMED. That’s ALL that MamaBear wants to make sure people know. I BLINDLY donated over FOUR coolers (that’s OVER 1000 ounces, folks) to NMB and I was TOLD that this milk would be processed by Prolacta and then distributed DIRECTLY to NICUs for preemies at NO COST to the Mamas.

Because of the information MamaBear has so PAINSTAKINGLY provided, I found out that my milk was being processed into HMF at a PROFIT. I don’t get it. Plasma donors are paid, so it stands to reason that plasma recipients pay a premium for plasma. Blood donors are NOT paid, so it stands to reason that the costs of processing blood is the only cost passed down to the recipient. If I had KNOWN that such a profit was being made, (and I have the email from NMB to prove that they ARE making a profit) I would not have donated to them.

As for MilkShare…I have donated a total of EIGHT coolers-full to ONE Mama/Baby. We didn’t ship at all; rather, we took 3 coolers on vacation and her hubby went 2 1/2 hours ONE WAY to pick up the milk. (Way to go, supportive daddy!) The second time, we sent 5 coolers with my in-laws when they went to visit family, and the daddy went 2 1/2 hours AGAIN ONE WAY to get the milk.

For the record, they only needed copies of my pregnancy labs (which is all most recipients request from what I’ve seen on MilkShare) so they can document that I was HIV and other yucky-free. This also would protect them in case Child Services got involved. They were TOTALLY willing to pay for coolers, packaging, shipping, milk bags, etc. They sent me 2 things of milk bags. The coolers were provided by Prolacta as I refused to be used by them anymore. I am actually giggling as I write this.

Please do not attack MamaBear. This Jr.Bear credits her for saving my milk! I was so distressed by being used that I almost lost my milk supply completely and MamaBear talked me through this. This is something she didn’t have to do, but did on her own time without any gain. Because of her support, I was able to continuing donating my milk without losing any of it to prolonged storage.

The IBMP worked beautifully before the partnership with Prolacta… The milk shipments to Africa certainly were more frequent, ironically! The only difference now is that there’s LOTS of money to be made… And money changes everything.

The lack of transparency and the egregious amount of TIME spent being vague about what’s happening to the milk and the money — and the fact that in their most popular news reports about the IBMP (ABC News, TIME, Oprah, etc.) NO mention is made of this 75/25 split with Prolacta… Man, that just adds up to a whole heap of UN-transparent “non-profit” mess.

Oh, and about “Concerned Mom.” I think if Concerned Mom is really a person who wanted to donate to Prolacta out of convenience, that’s fine (as long as she is fully aware of what she’s getting into). What I don’t understand is why she continued to talk smack about HMBANA banks and MilkShare even in the face of all kinds of evidence to refute her misinformed claims (she continued to write me, even more than what you see here in the comments section, with more denigration and more illogic — implying that by revealing the truth I’m disenfranchising all donors — as if! I’m not the one taking their milk and lying to them about what will really happen to it! …And her writing style is very … familiar). The ONLY people I’ve ever encountered who do that are people who benefit from Prolacta in some capacity, which is why I said what I said. I do not believe “Concerned Mom” is a free agent without bias. Based on everything she wrote, I believe she is someone whose motivations to say what she did are compromised by an association with Prolacta.

Also, you are right that it’s better to do something than nothing. My point with my original post is that yes, the IBMP does do SOMETHING… It’s just that I’m not sure that ALL the somethings it does are a net benefit to everyone involved. I still don’t know. If someone believes a lie, even though the lie “feels good,” isn’t it still a lie?